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Thread: Being Male

  1. #1
    It's OVER 5,000! 57Brave's Avatar
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    Being Male

    We used to get women on this forum. Not so much any more

    But since it's just us guys now, lets talk about what it is and isn't to be male
    Is it family, is it strength, is mature nurtuing --- I am curious what and how others think.

    I will start with this notion of what to me it isn't:


    Emily L. Hauser
    ‏Verified account @emilylhauser
    Jan 19

    A big part of toxic masculinity is teaching boys to bond over the shared humiliation of people they perceive to be vulnerable.

    I think we have all at one time or another found our selves in this situation.
    both sides !
    The giver and the taker.

    Some of the most steadfast men I have met have been more effeminite than RuPaul -- but solid men on all accounts


    What think you??
    What is your experience ?
    The best way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to make sure he doesn’t get a gun.

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    It's OVER 5,000! 57Brave's Avatar
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    In light of the release and our limited conversations of the Esquire article I would still like to hear what others think.

    Fathers what do you teach your sons
    Sons - what did your fathers teach you
    Brothers older and/or younger -was there bullying prevalent in your family?

    Athletes - how/ what were your coaches attitudes

    Military -- anyone besides my self with military experience

    LGBQ --- anyone here relate and what experiences

    anything else please add to it

    Please be respectfull
    .................................................. .................................

    I am really curious the experiences
    The best way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to make sure he doesn’t get a gun.

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    Shift Leader thethe's Avatar
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    George Carlin nailed it 30 years ago.

    The Pusification of man - Thats the goal.
    Natural Immunity Croc

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    Expects Yuge Games nsacpi's Avatar
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    I didnt read the article. I have two sons, ages 15 and 22. They are very different. I think the friends kids make are very important. Interestingly my more quiet son has made the better and longer lasting friendships. The more gregarious one makes friends easily but sometimes they haven't been such great friendships.

    I think both have had a bit of a tendency to consider girls slightly inferior. This is probably common among boys. But I think in their cases it has been curtailed by having an older sister who runs circles around them.

    All three have been active in sports and I think mostly those have been very good experiences. Learning to deal with a coach you dont like etc.

    I dont think most white boys grow up with a sense of entitlement. For the most part I think each generation is a little better than its predecessor in terms of attitudes about minorities, women, gays. Slow progress is the way I'd put it.

    I will make the general observation that people are more stressed nowadays due to things like smart phones and social media and it is a big problem for a subset of teens.
    Last edited by nsacpi; 02-12-2019 at 07:20 PM.
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    I <3 Ron Paul + gilesfan sturg33's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thethe View Post
    George Carlin nailed it 30 years ago.

    The Pusification of man - Thats the goal.
    Good times breed weak men.

    But if my kid dares to be a white male I'll punish him for his damn privilege right out of the womb

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    It's OVER 5,000! 57Brave's Avatar
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    I dont think Mr Carlin meant it the way you took it

    The best way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to make sure he doesn’t get a gun.

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    Quote Originally Posted by nsacpi View Post
    I didnt read the article. I have two sons, ages 15 and 22. They are very different. I think the friends kids make are very important. Interestingly my more quiet son has made the better and longer lasting friendships. The more gregarious one makes friends easily but sometimes they haven't been such great friendships.

    I think both have had a bit of a tendency to consider girls slightly inferior. This is probably common among boys. But I think in their cases it has been curtailed by having an older sister who runs circles around them.

    All three have been active in sports and I think mostly those have been very good experiences. Learning to deal with a coach you dont like etc.

    I dont think most white boys grow up with a sense of entitlement. For the most part I think each generation is a little better than its predecessor in terms of attitudes about minorities, women, gays. Slow progress is the way I'd put it.

    I will make the general observation that people are more stressed nowadays due to things like smart phones and social media and it is a big problem for a subset of teens.
    I agree with the notion of most white males don't grow up with a sense of entitlement -- because I dont think as teenagers with limited life experience it has ever dawned on them the privilege they inherited. Rich or poor. It isnt their fault they are born white or with means or with intelligence or with focus.

    To my mind the rubber hits the road at 18-19. What are they reading, who are they associating with, what is their aim.
    Some of that is the product of how they are reared - some in rebelling against how they were reared

    I grew up in 50-60s. My coaches were all either WWII or Korean veterans. My father was a Korean vet --- feelings were not something one spoke of. Male or female.
    The females rebelled by taking off their bras, demanding equal treatment. The male rebelled by avoiding the draft and military service our fathers regarded so highly.

    Who knows why people are more stressed today than then.
    Too much input --- too much opportunity.
    But, isnt that what we all want for our kids ?

    I was once trying to make a coaching point of never giving in and what that entails. Used to be fond of boxing metaphors.
    This one time I asked a young man " if you are in a fight do you want to throw the 1st punch or take the first"
    The kid looked puzzled --- when pressed this 16 year old boy confessed he had never been in a fight. Surveying the group, he wasn't the only one
    That was the day I realized this is what we wanted for our kids, not having to fight every day.
    I guess that leads to Harley Davidson themed restaurants
    ................

    We have one son in his 40's.
    seems well adjusted, but who knows these days
    Last edited by 57Brave; 02-12-2019 at 08:17 PM.
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    one more:

    To my mind Ms Hills tweet was referring to the post 2016 election inundation of the white male Trump voter articles.
    Guess you can take it any way you like

    Curious also a couple years out Trayvon Martin ---- hoodies vs MAGA hats
    The best way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to make sure he doesn’t get a gun.

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    Expects Yuge Games nsacpi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 57Brave View Post
    I agree with the notion of most white males don't grow up with a sense of entitlement -- because I dont think as teenagers with limited life experience it has ever dawned on them the privilege they inherited. Rich or poor. It isnt their fault they are born white or with means or with intelligence or with focus.

    To my mind the rubber hits the road at 18-19. What are they reading, who are they associating with, what is their aim.
    Some of that is the product of how they are reared - some in rebelling against how they were reared

    I grew up in 50-60s. My coaches were all either WWII or Korean veterans. My father was a Korean vet --- feelings were not something one spoke of. Male or female.
    The females rebelled by taking off their bras, demanding equal treatment. The male rebelled by avoiding the draft and military service our fathers regarded so highly.

    Who knows why people are more stressed today than then.
    Too much input --- too much opportunity.
    But, isnt that what we all want for our kids ?

    I was once trying to make a coaching point of never giving in and what that entails. Used to be fond of boxing metaphors.
    This one time I asked a young man " if you are in a fight do you want to throw the 1st punch or take the first"
    The kid looked puzzled --- when pressed this 16 year old boy confessed he had never been in a fight. Surveying the group, he wasn't the only one
    That was the day I realized this is what we wanted for our kids, not having to fight every day.
    I guess that leads to Harley Davidson themed restaurants
    ................

    We have one son in his 40's.
    seems well adjusted, but who knows these days
    fights are still a thing...but school policies including mandatory suspensions have had an effect...as has all the security cameras that schools have nowadays
    "I am a victim, I will tell you. I am a victim."

    "I am your retribution."

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    It's OVER 5,000! Runnin's Avatar
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    How you treat and feel about women is a red flag. Insecure men bully the vulnerable but these men are also secretly afraid of women, which makes their need to dominate them even worse.
    Last edited by Runnin; 02-14-2019 at 10:57 PM.
    FFF - BB, BB, 2B, HR, 2B, HR, 1B, BB, BB, 1B, BB, BB, HR

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    if my thought dreams could be seen goldfly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thethe View Post
    George Carlin nailed it 30 years ago.

    The Pusification of man - Thats the goal.
    i'm shocked to find out you don't understand george carlin bits
    "For there is always light, if only we are brave enough to see it. If only we are brave enough to be it." Amanda Gorman

    "When Fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross"

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    I <3 Ron Paul + gilesfan sturg33's Avatar
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    I'm pretty comfortable that a Male could not get away with admitting drugging people to sleep with and rob them like Cardi B is.

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    Connoisseur of Minors zitothebrave's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sturg33 View Post
    I'm pretty comfortable that a Male could not get away with admitting drugging people to sleep with and rob them like Cardi B is.
    Whoa, that's a bit off the mark of what was said.

    Also it's worth noting that she's a rapper. Snoop was arrested and tried for murder while recording Doggystyle. Tupac had a top 200 album while he was serving jail time for sexual assault. Biggie Smalls and Jay Z glorified their days as drug dealers. This is not a world that's the same as anything else.
    Stockholm, more densely populated than NYC - sturg

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    Cardi B is so fine, this is disturbing news because she could have any man she wanted.
    FKA Ozzie's Chainz

    Quote Originally Posted by thethe View Post
    Got to take the L sometimes.

    I've been used to it over the years.
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