I don't know where people go where they get terrible service. I can count on one hand, and have a few fingers left, the amount of times I've been displeased with my service. Even when food has taken a little long, or something was wrong, I tend to give the benefit of the doubt to the server if they apologize or are clearly trying to do their best. Sometimes I have bad days at work and my performance isn't where I'd like it to be, but I get paid what I make regardless. Sometimes things go wrong for a server and pricks just love it to happen so they can justify being a prick. I've rarely, if ever, had service where it seemed the server just straight up didn't care and there was clear lack of effort.
AA, if your wife seriously tips 10% max, she should not be going out to eat. That is absurd. Personally, I would not go out to eat with a person that did that because I'd feel responsible for paying the rest of their tip. When a person I'm with tries to skimp on the tip out of nothing but cheapness, be sure they end up ponying up more if our checks are together.