Do what Gerald does. Pour over everything. Pour gravy over everything.
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Gerald's gravy boat. He was kind enough to take me on a tour once.
Dude is phat
Broad shouldered
Pitch Butcher for the Team,
Strike Stealer, Bunter of Doubles,
Player as Fredi and the Braves' Freight Handler;
Stormy, husky, brawling,
Catcher of the Big Shoulders:
For everyone complaining about hitting with RISP the Laird has a .292 batting average with runners on and a .333 batting average with the bases loaded. He is also automatic on 2-0 and 2-1 pitches as he has a whopping 1.000 batting average when he hits those pitches. Clearly he just lives for the RBI as he has a .167 batting average with no runners on.
Laird will often deliberately have a bad at bat to give the pitcher a false sense of confidence.
For everyone complaining about hitting with RISP the Laird has a .292 batting average with runners on and a .333 batting average with the bases loaded. He is also automatic on 2-0 and 2-1 pitches as he has a whopping 1.000 batting average when he hits those pitches. Clearly he just lives for the RBI as he has a .167 batting average with no runners on.
With an army of Lairds I could conquer the world's kitchens.
He really tips the scales in our favor