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Sigh

Glad the 2018 book on Dansby still works.

But Swanson’s xwOBA is .319. [I’m only saying this for reverse jinx purposes.]

Big Willy Style

Tomlin Time, baby.

Ozuna due for a bit of bb luck

Dansby needs those Dan Uggla contact lenses.

Christ. I walked away for a minute and come back to find out that we’re doing this again.

Yeah, that’s weird. Couldn’t say much about that. Fortunately...

Signature moves. Austin had the Stone Cold Stunner, Sheik the Camel Clutch, Nature Boy had the Figure-4 leg lock. Fredi had the Carpenter Crush and Snit’s got the Leverage Lariat.

Don’t worry about Dansby. My reverse jinx should be in effect.

Yeah, there were a lot fewer dick and cocaine jokes.

Truist Park organist is gonna love that guy. Mood Indigo, Tangled up in Blue, basically an endless supply of songs with “Blue” in the title.

Like, how could that possibly be misunderstood?

Oh, so it’s fine for a guy to say that he blue himself, but we can’t acknowledge that he blue away 13 guys?

I don’t think Arcia is the answer, but the truth is that Dansby’s not very good, and never has been over 162. Like I said, he’s always benefited from the halo effect of being 1-1, being a nice guy, a local kid, and a fan favorite. Given the choice to watch Tron Simmons’s defensive value decline...

Apparently we use Dansby’s x numbers exclusively here, so we can imagine that he’s hitting, like, .250 and providing some value. His 2 game unconscious raking streaks and peppered clutch hits, followed as they always seem to be by 8 games of absolute futility, are enough to hypnotize. He went...

This team is neither the prettiest girl at the dance nor the most fun to dance with.

Unless...they offer Neck the job.

Well, there had to be some empathy there, because Jeff has taken a fastball to the face, and Chip has taken his share of speedballs to the nose.