Your point is a very strong one, but I do think there’s a distinction to be explored between the decline of marriage itself and the rise in those trends. As you allusion to, there’s a real question of the causal relationship here. The strife between the genders in particular seems unlikely to be fixable through an increase in marriages, all things equal.I’m sure you care about the downstream effects (causes?) from the significant decline of marriage.
Less sex
Less children
Loneliness and depression epidemic
More strife between the genders
Whether Joe and Susie (or John) get married or live together, I also don’t really care. But we have a problem with Joe and Susie (or John) even meeting each other in the first place.
I suspect the underlying issue is social media and the shift away from many in-person interactions. The echo chambers people find themselves in are major drivers of anti-social behavior and rigidity, and I think romantically relationships form easier with proximity and physicality that is hard to mirror online. There’s a sense of ease I feel just being next to my wife sometimes, and there are so many subtle moments in expressions and tone in the course of a relationship that are not replicable online. We’re more connected than ever, but I think some of that added connection is harmful to this particular type of relationship.
Once that first domino falls, I think it becomes a genuinely slippery slope. If you’re not able to communicate and compromise, you’re just going to re-enforce your own assumptions and grow lonely and bitter.